Our little dream should be done by 2019.
Am i excited for upcoming festive eve?
Sure.am i excited to have a meaningful raya with my small family. For everyone that know me,i dont really like Raya because for me it just another expended holiday that gathering other makcik pakcik cousin. So bored.
For ths 2016, i am pretty excited.gosh!
Am i tired?
Clueless to answers. Turbulent answer will come out if i answer that. More to a scale : 9 over 10.
Yes..i am damn tired
Am i stressful?
With my right forehead is beating hard,what is the exact answer?
Jujur dia kata pada aku
"Haha.masa awak masuk surau tu,saya dah tergelak-gelak sebab awak bermake up dan...."
"Hah...ngutok je orang..tau tak penat gila time tu..blah..blah..blah.." aku terus mengomel
"Tak nak dengar ke komen seterusnya?"
"Fine..just say it"
"Kepala awak nampak macam pokok dah..kah2."
"Kuang jaq..kuang jaq"
Hampir 9 bulan kahwin ni,baru aku nampak.
Real punya nampak.
I'm pretty sure that i quite distrubing with that statement. Somehow,i just wanna hide it from everybody. Now it permenantly state there. Its always remind me how my feeling were on that time. Nothing can be decribe the depression or the sadness i been thru. Quite hard to came at this stage. Fighting on with my own emotion that this time were fine. I can feel it in my womb. Somehow,i feel that i dont deserve it because of last brutal experience.
When you are happy,its like you are not allowed to share with other because some of them been thru more brutal or groovy experience than me. So i decide to share with selected person who are really salient. Thank you for receive and approching my unstabilze emotion for this time.
Almost 4 month entitle as mrs. Which i still resemble around would not taken any penny of time. By struggling most unstable emotion,yet. I still survived by my own crap and thanks to Allah. I still can grab an oppurtunities to prove as me a loyal servant.
The slacker and unambition always running off. Thus, i am not prefect at all. How to make everyone please. Hard. Even harder than my emotion. Myself still need some attention (not literally) and acknowlegment somehow rewarded me as existing human being.
Being a human so fragile. Carefull. You might break those speciment.