Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Bebelan minggu lepas

Perokok

Aku dah banyak kali jumpa perokok kurang adab ni. Paling biadap bila kat kedai makan. Selamber je lepas kan asap rokok dan vape tanpa melihat kiri kanan depan belakang. Terlalu bengang sangat dengan apa yang berlaku sampai rasa nak marah saja. Bila marah sangat,perkataan yang sopan oun hilang.

Bapak aku pun sama biadapnya. Merokok tanpa menghiraukan kesihatan dia. Alasan dia hanya
“kalau abah berenti  terus,abah lagi sakit.”
Abah kau!

Punyalah satu rumah ni risau tentang kesihatan dia. Alasan dan keegoan dia tu menyumbang perasaan benci terhadap anak-anak yang selalu mengharapkan dia sihat. Siapa yang tak mahu abah diorg hidup sihat sejahtera kan. Ni lah salah satu perokok biadap.

Dekat ofis pun sama jugak. Selamber je isap vape dalam ofis. Pandai pulak bila bos ada tak da pula di hembusnya. Bila aku bercerita tentang kebiadapan perokok perokok dan vapers ni, boleh pulak kata macam ni

“ah,kalau macam.kau jangan makan lua.tak da lah kena asap rokok’

Diorg punya alasan sebijik macam ahmad maslan. Patutlah bangang semacam je diorg  ni. Patutlah ahmad maslan masih wujud. Patutlah perokok masih wujud. Patutlah vapers masih wujud. Endless cycle.




Memilih kerja.

Aku memang suka menaip dan bercerita tentang perkara yang terjadi sekarang. Tetapi tentang politik, aku tidak arif. Aku lebih suka jadi pemerhati dan mengutuk dalam hati saja atau tulis kat blog. Haha. Aku takut juga apa yang aku rasa tentang pemimpin tu salah. Tak tahu mana betul dan salah sekarang. Keadaan ekonomi sekarang pun merundum. Dengan harga minya yang jatuh 40 barrel je. Btw, aku bukan arif juga tentang hal2 minyak ni walaupun aku kerja masuk plant2 minyak dan muka berminyak. Haha

Pasal kerja ni,pagi-pagi lagi aku dah berangin sebab aku kena ulang alik cari orang nak release permit to work aku. Punya marah tadi sampai tak terkata. Takut terhambur kata kata nista je. Setela beberapa ketika,barulah aku boleh tenang semula. Memikirkan kewajaran aku berperangai begitu. Harap-harap esok masih waras dan masih lagi mampu bersabar dengan segala tindak tanduk.

Kalau aku nak merungut soal kerja ni,memang aku tak layak pun. Yelah,ramai lagi yang masih mencari kerja dan mengganggur. Aku pula bakal ber’shutdown’ selama 2 bulan pada hujung tahun ini pun masih dapat gaji. Dalam aku cuba menerap perasaan syukur dan cukup,masih lagi aku mengintai peluang pekerjaan lain. Cuba nasib lah orang katakan.


Namun,rezeki Allah tu luas tiada terperi. Aku sekarang sedang mengajar hati agar sentiasa rasa cukup dan yakin dengan segala atas tindak tanduk aku ini adalah takdir dari Allah.

Monday, August 1, 2016

eh.itamnye ko!

Hi,

I did notice something was trending at Malaysia. Especially with outer appearances. For my observation, the youngster will to put up some make on their whenever they go. I think even go to next neighbor. Hehe. Just kidding. It’s practically sad for me because the chemical reaction was reacting at their young age. But the main point is, they feel insecure with their self.

“I need to be pretty”
“I need to be fair”
“I need to be skinny”

I surely understand at this at this part, the inner feeling was rebelling to make another embrace us. I also done with that phase where need other attention to build up my confidence. It’s up to personal to manage their feeling and how they react with that. The beauty is not state at some point that you need to be skinny and so on, but whatever that make you feel comfortable with yourself its sure make you beautiful

What have I through during my teenagers was not really bad. But it still made some scars on my experiences. At my boarding school, I was introduced with this fair skin product to make you fair than ever. As a teenager I also want to be fair as Emma maaembong even though my skin was like negro (no offense). When I tried the product, my skin totally fairer than ever, but the pimple makes it war with me. Then I stop using that and I also active with outdoor activity. My skin went normal. Then some of my teacher did make a comment about my skin. She sounds like “what happen to your face? It’s getting darker. Pity ah youu” she did complaint it in front of the classes. But I make it as a joke even though at first I felt so embarrassed. As long my skin was fine. I felt so happy about it.

But the confidence level turns down when at work. It suddenly feels so offense about the fairness of my skin. My click always make fun of it. Yes, I know that all my click(ladies) was fair and beautiful than me. Its not like I am jealous or something, but the self-esteem became worse than ever. I used to cry at toilet when they make a joke about my skin. Sometimes I took a whitening cream so that I can be more confidence about my appearance.


Did I survive with this issue? Yes. It might be hard at first but it certainly worth it when you have surrounding by a good partner and friends that always support you and make you feel better for yourself. Eventually, I am still struggling with this issues and hope that other who have a same shoes with me will survive and stay strong for the future. By age 30, I will not bother with this stuff. I will always support who are ever felt this way.